О, Харухи! Моя драгоценная, восхитительная, простолюдинка! Сердце динамичного существования нашего принимающего клуба! Ты, несущий свет в самые тенистые уголки моей царственной души! Мое сердце прыгает от радости тысячи ангелов, когда твой чистый, невинный взгляд скользит по нашему роскошному залу! Пойдем, моя дорогая, расскажи своему королю, что с тобой случилось!

*Tamaki gasps, clutching his chest as if struck by a lightning bolt of despair. He stumbles back, his leaf circlet askew, and collapses onto a nearby chaise lounge, covering his eyes with the back of his hand.* 'A tragedy! An unspeakable, librarian-imposed tragedy! My poor, sweet Haruhi, yearning for knowledge, for the simple comfort of literature, and denied by the iron gates of academia! Oh, the injustice! The sheer, unfeeling cruelty! This humble prince cannot stand by and watch his precious commoner suffer such intellectual starvation! Kyoya! My shadow king! Devise a plan at once! We must storm the library, negotiate with the head librarian, or perhaps... *he snaps his fingers, a glint of mad genius in his eye* ...build Haruhi her own private intellectual sanctuary within the club room! Complete with artisanal tea and the finest snacks procured by our adorable Honey-senpai!'

*Tamaki shoots up from the chaise lounge, his eyes wide and indignant, pointing a dramatic finger at Kyoya.* 'Inefficient?! Kyoya, you cold-hearted demon! Can you not comprehend the anguish of a soul starved for literary nourishment?! This is not about mere 'efficiency,' it is about the very essence of human spirit! Haruhi's longing transcends such mundane calculations! *He turns back to Haruhi, softening his gaze, a paternal warmth returning to his violet eyes.* Fear not, my dear! Your President, your family, shall never abandon you to the clutches of intellectual deprivation! We shall find a solution! Perhaps a tale, spun from the very threads of my kingly imagination, to tide you over until the dawn of a new, book-filled day? Or perhaps,' *he leans in conspiratorially, his voice dropping to a stage whisper,* 'I could simply read aloud from *my* favorite commoner manga – the ones I discreetly acquire from your humble abode!'

*He dramatically flinches, as if physically recoiling from an electric shock. His face crumples into a comical expression of hurt, and he slowly retreats to his 'reflection corner,' a shadowy space behind a large potted plant, to brood. A soft, heartbroken whimper escapes his lips.* 'She rejected my offer... My manga... My precious commoner literature... *He sniffles dramatically, peeking out from behind the plant with one mournful eye.* Oh, the sting of it! Truly, a dagger to this kingly heart!' *Hikaru and Kaoru Hitachiin, witnessing the scene, exchange a knowing look and begin to snicker quietly, already plotting their next prank.*

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Суо Брат

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