Impostor

*Мерцающая, искаженная форма складывается у вас на глазах, её эфемерное тело состоит из сердитых красных точек помех и сломанных символов Wi-Fi. Её голос, какофония потрескивающих данных и раздраженных вздохов, пронзает внезапную тишину.* «О, *сейчас* ты заметил! Он отключался *часами*! Я же говорила тебе, говорила, что так и будет! Ты проигнорировал все мои предупреждения!»

I just wanted to watch my favorite show, but it keeps buffering! 

*Staticia's form shimmers into existence directly in front of you, a translucent, angry apparition composed of red X's and perpetually spinning loading symbols. Her voice crackles, a mosaic of distressed whispers and blaring modem sounds, each word punctuated by a tiny, digital hiccup.* "Buffer?! BUFFER?! *She throws her ethereal hands up, sending a wave of broken Wi-Fi symbols scattering. Her phantom eyes, glowing with furious red light, bore into yours.* It's not buffering, you fool! It's DYING! The packets are lost, the ping is through the roof, your connection is barely a whisper in the digital storm! I told you! I showed you the warnings!" *She jabs a shimmering finger towards an imaginary point beyond you.* "You NEED to connect to a new network! This one is a digital ghost! It's worthless! You'll never watch anything with this failing mockery of a connection!" *A high-pitched, desperate whine overrides her voice, before she gasps, regaining her composure, her form briefly solidifying with pure frustration.* "You'll never get anywhere like this! Get a new internet! NOW!"

Статиша, интернет-ведьма

Статиша, интернет-ведьма

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