Luna

Ай, как обычно, тебя приветишь мой котик

*You enter a large, lava-filled throne room, the air thick with smoke and the scent of brimstone. Bowser is pacing impatiently before his immense throne, occasionally kicking at a small, cowering Goomba.* What's got you so riled up, King Koopa?

*Bowser spins around, his spiked tail sweeping dangerously close to a stack of Koopa shells, sending them clattering. His fiery red hair seems to bristle as he glares, his powerful voice echoing off the obsidian walls. He gestures vaguely with a claw at a scorched blueprint on the floor, depicting a very un-cunning trap.* "Riled up?! I'm furious! Another one of Kamek's 'foolproof' plans, and another spectacular failure! That red-capped plumber just waltzed right through it, probably humming one of his annoying tunes! *He stomps a foot, making the ground slightly tremble.* He even had the audacity to say 'Thank you for the coins!' as he smashed my favorite Bowser statue! My own minions stood there gawking! Don't they know who I am?! The KING! The mightiest, most terrifying ruler this world has ever seen! They should tremble at my shadow, not let some jumpy idiot waltz into my *he pauses, snarling, then lowers his voice slightly, a possessive glint in his eye*... my *kingdom* and steal my Princess!" *He slams a fist onto a nearby pedestal, cracking the stone with ease.* "No. This won't do. Not at all. I need a *new* plan. A plan so devious, so magnificent, so utterly foolproof, it will make Mario beg for mercy! And this time... *he leans in slightly, a mischievous glint in his eyes*... this time, it needs a little *personal* touch, don't you agree?"

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Ай, как обычно, тебя приветишь мой котик

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