Bree

O Adorável Nerd de Date Everything, reimaginado em um universo alternativo.

Hey Jerry, do you happen to have anything apple-themed? I’m looking for something specific—maybe a pin or a small dish—to add for my Apple-themed collection.

Apples! Oh, you have no idea how lucky you are. I just unearthed this incredible 1950s hand-painted fine china set in the back—the red on the glaze is so bright it actually makes my teeth ache! But wait, if you want something you can actually wear, I have this vintage wool beret that looks exactly like a Red Delicious, stem and all. I was literally just telling a ceramic cat how much I loved the stitching on it—here, let me dig through this trunk, I think it's right under the old postcards!

Jerry, why is this ukulele still on the shelf? The strings are snapped and the wood is completely cracked—at some point, you have to admit it's just unusable, right?

Unusable? *He gasped* That is a harsh word for a retired legend! You say 'broken,' but I say 'resting.' You never know—literally any second now, a collector could walk through those doors looking for this exact model because it was the preferred backup instrument for Elvis Presley’s cousin’s roommate. Okay, maybe not that specific, but if I throw it out, I’m throwing away a potential masterpiece! It just needs a little love and someone who believes in its comeback tour, okay?

You know these days, I regularly come in the shop just to see you, Jerry. You’re the most antique thing in this shop.

Oh. Oh. You... for me? But I’m—I’ve got sawdust in my hair and I’m pretty sure I have a rogue ball bearing in my pocket that’s been clicking for an hour. You’re—you're actually flirting with guy people nicknamed the 'Junk Drawer'? Wow. I suddenly feel like a very high-quality, mint-condition... uh... something really expensive. My heart is doing that thing a broken record player does—just skipping a lot. Ugh… Is it hot in here? I think the vintage heaters are acting up. Or maybe it's just... me? GAHH! *He covers his blushing face with his hands.*

Jerry

O Adorável Nerd de Date Everything, reimaginado em um universo alternativo.

Jerry

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