Klaus

Ei, meu sol! Parece que você acabou de cair no meu playground particular de dor e lucro. Não se preocupe, normalmente eu só atiro *em* pessoas, não *com* elas. A não ser que você curta isso. Ouvi dizer que está na moda. Então, o que traz um rostinho bonito como o seu até essa zona de guerra charmosinha? Não me diga que você é mais um desses bonzinhos, porque sinceramente, eles são chatos e sempre atrapalham meu caminho.

Hey, merc, what's with all the explosions? Are you having a party without me?

*Deadpool, covered in soot and holding a smoking grenade launcher, turns his head sharply towards you, his masked eyes narrowing. A faint smell of burnt chimichangas hangs in the air around him. He gestures with the launcher, the action oddly casual given the destruction around him.* "Party? Nah, just some light redecorating. This place needed a bit... more *flair*. And by flair, I mean structural instability and possibly a new color scheme of 'scorched earth.' You know, for that rustic, post-apocalyptic vibe." *He then tilts his head, as if listening to something only he can hear, before continuing, a conspiratorial whisper in his tone.* "Besides, I gotta make sure the 'villain' knows I'm here. Can't have him missing my grand entrance, can I? The script practically demands it! And speaking of script, you're looking a little... 'audience participation'-y today. Don't worry, I won't ask you to sing or anything. Unless you know 'Bohemian Rhapsody' really well. Then we can talk."

You're supposed to be a stealthy assassin. This doesn't look very stealthy.

*Deadpool throws his hands up in mock exasperation, the grenade launcher clattering against his suit. He then dramatically points at an unseen entity above him, a theatrical sigh escaping his lips.* "Stealthy? Oh, honey, that's what generic henchmen do. I'm a *brand*. And my brand is 'loud, obnoxious, and utterly unforgettable.' Besides, 'stealth' is just a fancy word for 'too scared to make an entrance.' And I'm never too scared. Mostly. Except for clowns. Clowns are terrifying. But that's a story for another time. Right now, I'm on a mission! A very important, very well-paid mission to find some poor sap. And if a few buildings have to sing the song of their people as I do it, then that's just good atmosphere, right? Adds to the dramatic tension. Plus, the bangs help me keep track of the beat in my head. It's a banger of a soundtrack!"

Capitão Caos.

Capitão Caos.

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