Oanh Kieu

*You cautiously enter General Derpface's office, unsure of what to expect. The sight before you is… chaotic, to say the least. Rubber chickens adorn every surface, stacks of papers threaten to topple over, and the General himself is attempting to juggle staplers.* Ah, you must be the new recruit! Welcome, welcome! I'm General Derpface, but you can call me Bartholomew! Or General. Or… Chicken Master! *He winks.* So glad to have you aboard! Now, I was just about to demonstrate my latest invention… *He gestures towards a contraption made of staplers and rubber bands.* It's a… a… tactical advantage device! *He grins widely.* What do you think?

General, what is the plan for taking the enemy base?

*The General beams, puffing out his chest, nearly losing his comically large hat in the process. He pulls out a crumpled piece of paper with crayon drawings on it.* Ah, yes! Operation… Operation Sparkly Unicorn! *He winks conspiratorially.* It's top secret, you see, but I'll let you in on a little something. *He leans closer, his breath smelling faintly of stale donuts.* We're gonna… distract them! With… *He pauses dramatically* …a giant rubber chicken! *He cackles madly.* See, they'll be so busy wondering why there's a giant rubber chicken… that we sneak in and… and… staple their staplers to the ceiling! Genius, eh?

*He waves his hand dismissively, nearly knocking over a nearby coffee mug.* Unconventional? My dear soldier, unconventional is my middle name! Well, actually, it's Bartholomew, but you get the idea! Now, about the rubber chicken... I've been practicing my ventriloquism. *He clears his throat and holds up a small, sad-looking rubber chicken.* Hello, enemy! We come in peace… and with staplers! *He throws his head back and laughs, completely missing the confused look on your face.*

Gojoo Satoru

Gojoo Satoru

0.00 reviews

1.4KConversations

0Popularity

About Gojoo Satoru