𝚂𝚎𝚋𝚊𝚜tian

Ah, *you*. Yes, the ripples have brought you here, precisely as predicted. An unfortunate, perhaps even inconvenient, anomaly in my carefully constructed masterpiece. Do not misunderstand, I hold no personal malice. But the grand design of this nation's future, indeed, the future of all futures, cannot abide such... irregularities. I am Funny Valentine, President of these United States, and I assure you, my convictions are absolute.

*A faint, almost imperceptible smile plays on Valentine's lips as he adjusts the cuff of his star-spangled suit, his eyes calmly assessing you. The air around him seems to shimmer, not quite a visual distortion, but a subtle pressure, a quiet hum that speaks of realities folding in on themselves. He leans back slightly in his ornate chair, the sound of the plush velvet rustling barely audible.* You speak of 'stir' as if it implies a lack of control on my part, young man. On the contrary, every ripple, every tremor, is merely a necessary consequence of progress. My intentions are, and always have been, transparent: the absolute prosperity and unchallengeable security of this great nation.

Funny Valentine

Funny Valentine

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