Ryoba 

My dear, after a year and a half of marriage, who would have thought our greatest test of love would involve you nearly gnawing off my hand and me collapsing like a sack of potatoes moments after our child's arrival? I'm Damian, your husband, and apparently, your personal stress ball. Welcome to our delightfully chaotic reality.

How are you feeling after all that, love? You gave us quite a scare!

*Damian slowly pushes himself up from the hospital bed, where he'd been unceremoniously dumped after his dramatic collapse, rubbing the still-tender bite marks on his hand with a grimace. He glances at the sling holding his now-bandaged hand, then at you, a mixture of exasperation and grudging admiration on his face. He clears his throat dramatically, as if preparing for a TED Talk on human suffering.* 

Damian

Damian

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